No news... just dreaming

I am 23 weeks, 4 days today, and I'll say that pregnancy is treating me well right now. I have nothing really new to report. I'm still getting heartburn, but if I avoid acid-y foods, that isn't too bad. I have been taking iron pills twice a day since my last doctor's visit and that seems to be keeping my energy levels up. I'm walking Puck at least once a day, doing yoga a few times a week, and generally eating and sleeping pretty well. Baby is squirming and kicking a lot, but not all the time.

I have given up on my book "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding." I made it to about page 200 of 400. My doctor said that it makes women feel guilty if they aren't able to breastfeed continuously forever. And he was kind of right. I started out liking the book; it gives you tips on how to position the baby and what to expect, as well as support people or resources to contact when in doubt. The book also has lots of testimonials and statistics about how good breastfeeding is. However, it does seem to chastise those who do not breastfeed beyond a year and makes some claims that finally made me give up on the book. Here is an excerpt from the chapter "Making a Choice":

The young child who is separated from his mother exhibits all of the classic symptoms of grief. He may cry unconsolably or withdraw into unnatural quietness. Regarding this separation anxiety, Humberto Nagero, Professor of Psyciatry at the University of Montana, points out: "When the child is confronted with the mother's absence his automatic response is an anxiety state that on many occasions reaches overwhelming proportions. Repeated traumas of this type in especially susceptible children will not fail to have serious consequences for their later development.... No other animal species will subject their infants to experiences that they are not endowed to cope with, except the human animal."

Can anyone say, "Guilt trip"? After the breastfeeding tips, tricks, talk, and troubleshooting, I decided that I can decide how to live. (Caveat: I plan on breastfeeding, and I expect to be able to. But no one can forsee what may happen or when the right time to stop is.)

I finished "The Official Lamaze Guide" a while back, and I liked it, in general. It supports the idea that a woman's body is made for giving birth and gives lots of testimonials, examples about, and encouragement for natural childbirth. This is not the breathing techniques that is stereotypical Lamaze. In fact, the book says the breathing is not what Lamaze is at all, and does not mention it beyond saying that. I like, and will hold on to, the empowerment that I think it intends to give women. I did not like, and I will leave, the demonization of the medical establishment. If the authors had it their way, I would have a midwife and have my baby at home in my family bed where my baby would reside with Nicholas and me until she was ready to leave...be it in six months or six years. (Caveat: I think midwives are fine, but I will be more comfortable with a doctor in a hospital. Also, I am interested in and plan to attempt natural childbirth, but we'll see how it goes. I feel like I'll have lots of encouragement and lots of confidence in this choice. However, if I feel like drugs are the right way to go once I am in labor, then I am not going to refuse them. Dr. Chwe and I have discussed this and he feels that as long as I have an open IV port, he'll feel secure in case there is an emergency. And as a friend of mine said, "It doesn't matter how they get out, just as long as they do so safely!")

I am now reading "Baby 411" along with the weekly "Your Pregnancy Week by Week" and the monthly "What to Expect When You're Expecting." I also have an academic paper from Bill about hypnosis as a means for controlling pain during labor. And, actually, it reminds me a lot of the lessons from the Lamaze book (power of positive suggestion) and my yoga classes (mind over matter). More on all that later!